URGENT

Drinking and celebrating with a keen urgency has always seemed to me to be a surrogate means of punishment for that sense of disappointment for not having achieved more during the year.  

END

When you’re striving for something and you fall down it’s never the end.  So long as you’re still breathing it’s not the end.  There are no judgements that matter except your own.  So long as you keep getting up it’s not the end. 

It may be the end of the year, and you may have accomplished some or all the goals you set for yourself, it still isn’t the end.  There is only one end -- the great equalizer that levels us all, literally.  But until that happens, and you may find yourself stumbled and down, it’s just for the moment, it’s not permanent.  Get up and if you have to, start again.  

ONE THING

Resolve to leave all thoughts that do not help you in 2012.

TWO

Either/Or

Yes/No

Black/White

Are NEVER (yes never) the only options.

If we’re insisting using them what we’re really doing is stacking the deck.  Influencing the outcome.  Narrowing down the possibilities so thinly means we need to manipulate and control the outcome.

SEE

See an excuse for what it is...FEAR.

SPECIAL

Compassion, understanding and forgiveness are available to us in great abundance and at all times.  Not only is there enough to go around for the people in our immediate circle, there is a huge surplus for others.  We need to disseminate it, spread it, give it away, touch as many strangers as we possibly can.

To do it just at this time of year is to be contrived.  Is to engage in fraud.

ALTERNATIVE

So long as the alternative is still not painful enough, we will not be compelled to do what makes our heart sing.

The alternative needs to NOT be an option.

TRY

The only way we can possibly disappoint is if we don’t even bother to try.

WILDERNESS

 “God let you go through the wilderness first, so when you get ready to lead others, you will have credibility through the things you have suffered.”  ~ Bishop TD Jakes

Yes, yes, yes.  Those of us who are struggling right now thinking whether it’s all worth it, heed those that have come through the other side. It is worth it.  Don’t give up.  It will all make sense.  Nothing is wasted.

EVIDENCE

The thing is we are already good enough, worthy enough and whole but we don’t believe it, it’s too much of an abstract concept.

Doing what we were meant to do is the evidence.  It’s the proof we need to believe it.  That’s what makes all the difference.

WHOLE

Not doing what you were meant to do means that you’ll never experience the feeling of being good enough, worthy enough or whole.  Until you’re doing what makes your heart sing you will always be at the mercy of those that will tell you, and take great pleasure in telling you, how you come up short.

Doing what delights you means you’re feeding your soul.  It means that you feel good enough, you feel worthy and you feel whole.  When you’re feeding your soul other people’s opinions will not sink in.  Rather it will roll off you like water off a duck’s back.

SHOWING UP

That’s 25 percent of the work.  Seventy-four percent is in showing up the next day and the next and the next.  The one percent is the actual work.

Showing up once is good but not a big deal, anyone can do that.  What sets sensational apart from good is the consistency, the dependability, the focus, the determination, the doggedness to just keep showing up until you accomplish what you set out to do.

START

Waiting for the perfect time to start toward your goal actually means you’re waiting for the time that the fear you have in doing the work to achieve that goal, will go away.  

Here’s the thing, the fear won’t go away.  I’ve said this before, and I’m sure I’ll say it again.  If you have a goal, whatever it is, start now.  You don’t have to wait for New Year’s Eve to make a resolution.  Start now.  That way when New Year’s Eve rolls around you’ve already made some progress in moving toward your goal.

Think about it, a year has passed.  Another year will also pass.  So where do you want to be?  Do you want to be in the same place you’re at right now bemoaning the fact that you got derailed or you procrastinated?  Sure you can be stuck there, it’s a nice safe place to be.  But time will pass, a year and then another and then another will pass and you will be in exactly the same place you’re at right now.

Start now.  Do it in spite of...despite of... the fear.  What you have to remember is that EVERYBODY does it this way.  Everybody who has achieved their goals has done it this way.  Has moved forward in spite of the fear.

GO.

DISTANCE

Some days what’s needed is a little distance...a little distance from ourselves.  Consciously stepping outside of our head even for just a brief moment, and observing ourselves as if we were watching someone very dear to us, reminds us how very hard we are on ourselves most of the time.  

DISCOURAGEMENT

Discouragement, I think, hasn’t really been awarded sufficient respect for its potential to devastate.  But discouragement is insidious.  It creeps up, and in and under and worms its way into the crevices in your brain and before you know it, what was just moments ago a vague sense of “dis-courage” or lack of courage, feels now like the deepest pit of despair.

Sometimes people discourage us because they’re trying to shield us from harm.  But other times those that will discourage us do so out of their own lack of courage.  Your inner wisdom will know the difference.

DWELL

Dwelling doesn’t serve anyone, most especially us.  We tend to dwell on a thing most when the lesson we’ve just learned is a big one.  When we didn’t fully grasp what the universe was telling us, but now, now that the brick wall has fallen on us...we get it.  

Be grateful for the education and move on.  The people who love us will not judge us and they’ve moved on already.  

TEACHERS

Teachers aren’t here to teach us what we already know.  Teachers show up to show us what we don’t know.  What’s perhaps difficult for us to grasp.  What we didn’t even know we didn’t know.  And what we thought we didn’t know we needed to know.

And if you think you can spot your teacher, think again. Sometimes they look like a puppy, a cat or a rabbit. Sometimes they look like a police officer writing you a ticket, sometimes it’s a little old lady crossing the street, and sometimes, our teacher looks like the guy who just cut us off...and is flipping us the finger.

I find it ironic that teachers more often than not show up to teach us patience and gratitude.  Weird, huh?

WISH

Rarely does what we wish for arrive the way we want it to.  Most of the time it’s almost unrecognizable and we continue to wish for it because we can’t see it.  Other times it so exceeds our expectations that we still can’t see it because we don’t feel worthy.  

The point, I think, is to receive whatever presents itself with grace knowing that good or not so good doesn’t last forever.  And rather than lurch from the depths of disappointment to the highest peaks of elation, a steady state of gratitude will always serve us best.

MONKEY WRENCH

Peace of mind comes easily sitting on top of a mountain in the Himalayas.  It comes less easily when, in real life, you continuously have monkey wrenches being tossed in your direction.

That’s not to say that we stop trying to achieve peace of mind, it just means we need to be very, very kind to ourselves in the process.

DARKNESS

Ignorance precedes judgement.  Judgment precedes gossip.  Gossip precedes cowardice.   All together they precede hate.  Not hate of the other, hate of ourselves.

ROAD

Once we reach a certain age there aren’t many roads that are unfamiliar.  In fact, we’ve tread well-worn paths on roads that are a variation of ones we’ve walked down at one point or another.  We become complacent.  We look for the predictable and deliberately avoid roads that look even remotely unfamiliar.

That’s a shame because it’s getting lost in unfamiliar terrain, facing unpredictable challenges and ending up at unexpected places that not only keeps the roads we travel on interesting, it keeps us interesting.

CLIFF

The thing about jumping off that proverbial cliff and building your wings on the way down, is that until you get those wings built you will need to get comfortable plummeting to earth head first.

But engaging in any risk takes getting used to the free fall that precedes regaining equilibrium.  And then...perversely, once that risk becomes a sure thing, we’ll be looking around for another cliff.

Moving from cliff to cliff is how we realize our best lives.  If you think about it, it’s really less scary than sitting around watching your life pass you by.

MORE

Lack isn’t the absence of a thing.  Lack isn’t about not having more, or enough.  No.

Lack is about not being grateful for what we have.

MAGICAL

The magical thing that happens when we look for ways to help others is that our life immediately feels better, lighter and brighter.

We clear a path for light and brightness when we disengage from our narcissistic tendency of gazing at our own navels.  

It feels like magic...but it isn’t.

EXPANSIVE

Life may be short, but is your life wide?

Does your life include people that you truly care about and truly care about you?  Is your life filled with things that matter to you?  Is your time spent on things that make a difference not just to you and your immediate clan or kin, but to complete strangers.

An expansive life, a wide life, is judged by the delight you bring to others.  It truly is.

We move toward an expansive life when we ask ourselves, often: “How can I make someone else’s life easier?”